What Others Think About You Is None Of Your Business

Sounds crazy, right?  Well, like my coaching advice to “Interview for the Company, Not the Job” and “Why Not Contact Board Members in Your Search?”, this non-traditional career search idea makes sense.

As MENG members, we are all trained marketers.  Just as we have learned how to sell products and services for our employers or consulting clients, we have also learned that we have to effectively market ourselves.  So, we have done all the right things.  We have written our own Creative Platforms (key message, target audience, support points and 4-5 stories that support our candidacy) and then revised our resumes and written interesting bios and 60 elevator speeches.  We have created catchy selling lines for our websites and our business cards and in some cases, handed out coffee cups to Brand ourselves.  We have done everything possible to shape others’ opinions of ourselves.

And then we find that people forget what we do for a living, fail to contact us when they have a problem to solve that we would handle in a minute, draw a blank when they are called as a reference for us and simply, don’t seem to know us after all that work.  Even our own mothers ask “What is it that you do?”

So we wonder and agonize over why this is often the case.  Why don’t people call?  Why doesn’t the HR person call me back for another interview?   Why didn’t a board member at XYZ Company (where I really deserve to work!) respond to my very clever email?  Why didn’t my friendly headhunter (who I have helped numerous times!) call me regarding a search that I know she has which is so perfect for me?

Wonder, wonder, wonder.  Worry, worry, worry.  All it does is cause you to lose sleep and irritate your loved ones.

Realize, please, that you can only do so much about marketing yourself and impressing your profile and goals on others.  Do your best and then leave it to the gods and move on to another opportunity or activity that offers promise.

Frankly, others probably think you’re terrific.  They are just spending most of their time on their own careers and jobs, and all the work it takes to keep them alive and growing